Journey to Jack! Great Mileage Give-Away!

If you are reading this blog, you already know that our family is working to adopt a 3-year-old little boy from China – Jack!  We are finishing up the U.S. side of the adoption process and working on raising the money needed to pay the overseas expenses of our journey. We have acquired a variety of things to give away in response to others helping us and want to count you in!!

As we near the home stretch in the process we get closer to paying our travel fees – just over $14,000 of them.  To make this amount easier to wrap our minds around we have broken things down into a mileage format.  This allows us to share the information more easily and ask our friends and family to pray about sponsoring miles ($1/mile) to bring Jack home. Interestingly enough, the amount of money we need for travel and in-country expenses is almost exactly how many miles we will travel to China and back to pick up Jack.

The distance from our home to Jack and back = 14,626 miles.

The estimated travel and in-country fees for the trip = $14,625

So here is your opportunity to help us travel while gaining a chance to win some great prizes.

Sponsor 10 miles ($10) and be entered in a drawing for Dave Ramsey’s Financial Peace Jr. with the kid’s 6 book series    

(You will be entered once for every 10 miles sponsored)
--If 1462 people gave $10, we would reach our goal.

Sponsor 15 miles ($15) and be entered in a drawing for an Autographed copy of Dave Ramsey’s Total Money Makeover AND the Act Your Wage board game 

(You will be entered once for every 15 miles sponsored)
--If  975 people gave $15, we would reach our goal.

Sponsor 20 miles ($20) and be entered in a drawing for a Coby SNAPP Swivel Camcorder

(You will be entered once for every 20 miles sponsored)
--If 731 people gave $20, we would reach our goal.

Sponsor 25 miles ($25) and be entered in a drawing for Dave Ramsey’s Financial Peace University Membership Kit  

(You will be entered once for every 25 miles sponsored)
--If 585 people gave $25, we would reach our goal.

Sponsor 50 miles ($50) and be entered in a drawing for a Sony 7” Portable DVD Player

(You will be entered once for every 50 miles sponsored)
--If 293 people gave $50, we would reach our goal.

*BONUS DRAWING*– For every 5 miles sponsored (at any level) your name will be entered into a bonus drawing for a $50 Target Gift Card.

It is that easy!  Choose your level (or levels!) of sponsorship and get your name in the hat.   

Payment may be submitted via paypal here at our family blog site OR 

by check/mail to ....

Drawings for all prizes will be held on Sunday, January 16. 

Winners will be announced via email and facebook the same day.

*Sponsorship payment must be received by midnight January 15 to participate.

Questions may be left here as comments or directed to...

So, what are you waiting for?  Why not start the year off right!!

Thank you!

90% of proceeds will go directly toward our travel and in-country adoption fees. 

10% of proceeds will be donated to Show Hope, a movement for orphans. www.showhope.org

Nothing Philosophical - Part 5

Judges 6:36-38
Then Gideon said to God, “If thou wilt deliver Israel by my hand, as thou has said, behold, I am laying a fleece of wool on the threshing floor; if there is dew on the fleece alone, and it is dry on all the ground, then I shall know that thou wilt deliver Israel by my hand, as thou has said.”  And it was so. 

While in China our team met regularly for group devotional time.  Late in our week at Maria's Big House one of our daily devotional times turned to a discussion of Gideon and the fleece.  A few people shared about times in their lives when they had "thrown down the fleece" and looked for a sign from God.  I remember thinking how strange I thought this sounded.  Not to belittle the stories that were told in any way, they were all stories of faithful encounters, but the whole idea of asking for a sign seemed a bit like giving God an ultimatum or striking a deal.  I can remember a time in college when I tried going this route in relation to a young man I thought I was supposed to marry (You do this, and I'll know it is this way; You don't do this, then I will know I’m wrong), and I learned very clearly that God does not do as I tell Him to. God doesn’t work on our timelines or in response to our dictation so all of this fleece talk seemed odd to me.  I know that striking deals with God isn't what was meant, and ultimately not the mindset of anyone recounting such a story, but the whole topic had my mind wandering to my past and made me a bit uncomfortable.

Anyway, in a brief moment of gutsiness (well, not gutsy for most people, but definitely for me given my conflicted state of mind), the day we left Luoyang I asked Mariah to write down the name of the skin condition Jack has so that I might learn more about it.  When I finally worked up the nerve to ask her a group of us were standing around chatting so I simply asked her to do it when she had a chance.  She cheerfully said she would and I felt a lot less like I was prying into someone else’s business. 

From there I began to deal with this mama-bear, jealous, sad, disappointed realm of feelings.  I was convinced that another family was going to adopt my boy and feeling overwhelmed by how upset this turn of events was making me.  I might not be able to bring Jack home, but I could certainly pray for him, for his specific medical conditions and for his forever family.  I was down, but I didn’t have to be out of the game entirely.

Suddenly, it was time to leave Maria's Big House of Hope and head back to Beijing and then home to the United States.  On our last day at Maria's I spent the majority of my time with my boys on the third floor, but I also made a point of spending time with Jack.  I was still struggling with the emotional roller coaster created by my desire to bring him home and in some ways it made it even more difficult to sit and play with him.  I desperately wanted to enjoy his company, but it made my heart ache to look at his face and know that he would never be my little boy.  I know this must make me sound like either the most bitter woman in the world or that I completely lost my mind in a matter of days, but words do not do justice to the inner battle waging in my heart - a battle between joy that a family was going to pursue his adoption and sadness that it could not be us.

Then, I really did do something gutsy.  The night we left Luoyang, I decide to throw down the fleece.  Remember I told you about that devotional fleece conversation?  Well, for all of the questions it raised for me during its happening, it ended up being a turning point in my journey with Jack.  As we traveled back to our hotel in Beijing, a journey involving both bus and plane, I had a lot of time to think.  I didn't want to feel the way I was feeling.  I didn't want to be upset about there being two families interested in Jack.  I wanted to be happy and thankful and full of joy that this little boy, an orphan with no family to call his own, now had two families desiring his presence in their family.  This was GREAT news.  This was not something to be upset about.  And so I spent a lot of that day’s travel time trying to sort things out with God. 

I wanted to know His mind.  I wanted to know His will.  And I wanted to know where He wanted me to be in all of this.  Was this other family the family for Jack?  Was I supposed to push forward with my interest in bringing him home?  Was I supposed to walk away from my desire and pray and support another family's efforts?  Or was I supposed to simply pray and wait and see where things led?  All of these questions were running through my mind as it kept going back to all of those fleece stories.  And finally it hit me.  Maybe that was what I was supposed to do.  Maybe I was simply supposed to let go and let God show me how to proceed.  So, with great trepidation, I did it. 

Lying in bed that night I made a commitment to let it all go and to accept the path God showed me.  The fleece?  The medical information I requested from Mariah. We would be with Mariah for one last full day in Beijing and then board our plane to head home the next morning.  If in that time Mariah came to me with the name of Jack's skin condition, then I would know I was supposed to pursue Jack and the possibility of his adoption in a purposeful way.  If, on the other hand, Mariah had forgotten about the request and did not mention it again, then I would go home satisfied that another family might very well pursue an adoption and I would put my efforts into praying for Jack to find his forever family.  As crazy as it may be for me to have "thrown down the fleece", I can tell you with no uncertainty that as soon as I had prayed this through a surreal feeling of peace overtook my heart and I was instantly on the road to healing.

The last day of our trip was spent sight-seeing in Beijing, in the rain no less.  We spent the morning touring the Forbidden City and walking through Tiananmen Square.  We had one last traditional lunch in a restaurant sporting some seriously crazy looking sea life, and we braved a downpour to shop at the Dirt Market.  All in all, a busy day - and all in all, a great time.  I had many occasions to speak with Mariah throughout the day, but never once did I broach the subject of Jack and never once did I worry about it.  In all honesty, I did begin the day waiting to see if she would mention my request, but by the time we returned to our hotel late that afternoon the inner battle I had been fighting was completely out of my mind.  Not to say that I had forgotten Jack, surely none of us had forgotten anyone we had encountered at Maria’s, but there was no struggle left alive inside me.  I don’t think that I had accepted that Jack would not be coming home to us it is simply that the issue of us-or-them-or-someone-else was completely out of my mind.  People often speak of a “peace that passes all understanding” and that is the only way I can describe my mindset by the end of that day.

Our last evening together, our team spent several hours (a lot longer than expected) in a debriefing type devotional time before having our final dinner together.  We laughed a lot, cried a bit, and went around the room once again this time sharing what we were leaving with rather than why we had come.  It was an amazing time of fellowship and it was during that group time that I realized how much I had not been struggling with the Jack situation that day.  I was startled at first and then a bit shocked by how quickly the Lord had relieved my pain, and I took all of this as a sign that indeed I was to go home with prayers in my heart and become an advocate for Jack and his future forever family.  And I was okay with that.  I wasn’t thrilled by any means, but I had thrown down my fleece and the Lord had responded by providing no response, and I was okay with that.

Given this new inner peace and the mindset that accompanied it you can only imagine my surprise when in the middle of our very late dinner (we’re talking about 8:30-9:00 that night) Mariah looked across the table at me and said, “Oh!  You asked me to write down the name of Jack’s skin condition for you.”  I know for a fact that my mouth fell open, and I’m pretty sure from the look I got from Mariah the color drained out of my face as well.  I don’t remember exactly what I said to her, but I know that suddenly my mind was racing a hundred miles a minute.  Really?!  God had led me to this comforting place of peace only to throw me this huge curveball?  There is no doubt in my mind that He knew exactly what He was doing, and I know I never would have been able to truly accept this journey to Jack as His will if He had not cleared away all of the other junk first, but I will tell you again - this was crazy!  I had to explain to Mariah later why I had such a strange reaction to her simple statement, but the explanation served as a wonderful testimony of faith as I shared just how the Lord had truly delivered a miracle for me. 

Now, all I had to do was figure out how in all the world God was going to make us eligible to adopt without Jack having to spend several more years as an orphan.

God is GOOD and I must share!

Hurray!  Hurray!  God is SO GOOD!  I cannot begin to tell you how completely amazing our God really is.  I have been telling myself for weeks that the upside to our home study moving so slowly through the review process is that it is providing us more time to come up with the adoption money we need.  Not really very comforting, but my way of trying to put a positive spin on things completely out of my control.  We know that God is in control, and no matter how frustrated we get with the humanness of this process we recognize the truth of Romans 8:28 - "And we know that in all things God works for the good of those who love him, who have been called according to his purpose." - and today He proved it.  Again!

About a month ago I began sending out a weekly update letter to our friends and family giving a quick overview of our adoption ins and outs.  (My way of trying to cut back on the number of emails I was inundating people with.)  Well, as I compiled the information for today's email I couldn't help but get specific with the dollars and cents of what we will need to pay to varying agencies as soon as our home study is actually finalized.  $890 here, $2000 there, another $500 over there...  And then I got even more specific with how much money we actually have in the bank - from fundraisers, donations and savings - to throw at those fees ($2261).  And then just how much we were short ($1129).  And then, amidst a good amount of self-admitted begging, I continued to ask people to support us in our fund raising efforts, help us get the word out about our various fund raising opportunities, and most of all PRAY.  And, boy, was someone praying!

Just minutes after sending out this email Dan's computer "dinged" telling him to check his Inbox.  He did, and he promptly said to me, "How much money did you say we still need right now?"  I knew by the tone of his voice he had something miraculous to tell me, but I must admit my initial response was, "Why?"  He then proceeded to tell me that he had just received an email stating that a travel voucher he had filed for the final reimbursement of moving expenses (from February) had been paid and posted to our bank account.  The amount?  $1800!  Enough to tithe, cover the current money shortage, and still have some left over for the next hurdle.  Absolutely AMAZING!  God is GOOD!  No other way around it.  :) 

We knew that this payment was coming down the pike, but we never dreamed it would be this large - we were hoping for about $500 - and the timing could not be more perfect.  Gone are the doubts about covering the cost of those three upcoming fees.  Let the home study be signed - we can afford to move forward!  Hurray!  Hurray!  Hurray!

Shout for joy to the LORD, all the earth.
Worship the LORD with gladness;
   come before him with joyful songs.
Know that the LORD is God.
   It is he who made us, and we are his;
   we are his people, the sheep of his pasture.
Enter his gates with thanksgiving
   and his courts with praise;
   give thanks to him and praise his name. 
For the LORD is good and his love endures forever;
   his faithfulness continues through all generations.

                 PSALM 100

Nothing Philosophical - Part 4

I feel I must put a disclaimer at the beginning of this post as some who may read it (and its sequel) were involved in the events.  The story is what it is and I cannot change that.  Hopefully there will be no uncomfortable moments...

I may not remember when Jack first worked his way into my world, but I do remember being pulled again and again into the areas where I might find him.  Something about him captured my heart and I often found myself going out of my way to be where he was.  There was a group of boys up on the third floor whose very presence called to me as well, so I ended up spending the majority of my time at Maria's split between the Snow White and Tinker Bell rooms.  I didn't feel 100% comfortable "stalking" Jack as it made me a bit sad to know I would be leaving him behind in just a couple of days, and he was a popular guy with many others in our group so I often felt a bit unsettled just hanging out in his room.  In hindsight, I guess I simply didn't want to put myself "out there" and feel the things I knew I would feel if I truly embraced how interested I was in the possibility of making him a Shipley.

The first time I went looking for more information about Jack, his medical condition, and his chances for adoption I spoke with Mariah, the head nurse at Maria's.  When I mentioned Jack's name, her immediate response was "He really needs a family."  This comment warmed my heart, but it also made me very sad.  I think it was actually at that moment that I realized just how much I wanted to bring him home to our family and how disappointed I was that this was not currently an option.  This ended up being a very short conversation since, as I mentioned, I didn't feel quite comfortable putting myself out there and I chickened out when I had the chance to ask lots of questions.

The next day, feeling rather frustrated with myself for not getting more information when I could, I broached the subject of Jack's adoption possibilities again, this time with Mikey the liaison between Show Hope and Maria's. Again, the immediate response to my inquiry was "We really need to find him a family."  After a brief conversation about whether or not Jack even had, or qualified for, an adoption file with CCAA, I was feeling even more discouraged as Mikey had mentioned the interest another in our team had of adopting Jack.  I know it may seem quite silly that someone being interested in adopting Jack would be disappointing to me, but this was purely the selfish response I had as I knew we did not currently qualify to adopt and that this other interested party would have no problem.  My feelings were not those of someone focusing on Jack and his well-being, but of my own selfish desire to do the adopting and jealousy that someone else might be able to do what I could only wish for.  Yes, terrible, but human.

Truth be told, and I have promised you truth in my story, that jealousy would almost get the best of me before I would realize the enormity of God's hand in this whole thing.  After speaking with both Mikey and Mariah I knew that Jack definitely "qualified" for a place on the CCAA waiting child adoption list, but still did not know if he was on it.  The way the system works the staff at Maria's have no control over which children come to them or when children arrive or depart.  They have no official knowledge of which children have adoption files, nor do they know for certain which children ever will.  Being familiar with and working knee-deep in the system Mikey and Mariah may have gut feelings about things, but there is no certainty of anything until they get official notice from the orphanage administration.  All that said, both Mikey and Mariah shared that Mikey had a strong feeling Jack had a file, but they had no proof either way.  What that meant to me (at least until I got my head straight) was that the other party interested in adopting Jack could well do so - find the file, complete the paper chase, etc. - long before we would even be able to get ourselves financially eligible to start the process.  And to be perfectly honest, that made me mad.  Mama-bear-protecting-her-cub mad, but mad just the same.

Now I must add in here, that even in the midst of all this going on - and you must remember I am talking a matter of just two or three days here - I knew exactly how crazy it was to be mad.  What a ridiculous thing to be angry about.  Two families wanting the same child.  Aah!  How awful!  What a terrible ordeal!!  (Can you hear the sarcasm in my typing?)  I knew it was stupid to be upset.  I knew it was dumb to be jealous.  But I also knew I was.  I just wanted this to play out the way I wanted it to, and isn't that when we get the most irrational?  Here I was, just days after reading that handbook in a Chicago hotel and smiling so smugly about this trip not

And then there was God.  Yes, He was there all along, but after I wallowed in my self-pity for a day or so I guess He had had enough because He very kindly decided to knock me over the head and take me down a notch with just a bit of His glorious grace.  (to be continued...)

***I must add here that it is quite important to keep one thing straight in this story.  The only information I had about another party being interested in adopting Jack was a casual comment made by Mikey during our one-on-one conversation.  I know that by pointing this out it probably makes me seem even more irrational and ridiculous, but I feel it is important to point out how easily Satan will manipulate our weaknesses for our own demise.  Throughout the inner struggle I mention here and in the next installment of this story, it is important to note that only in my mind did this other family make the decision to adopt, file paperwork and pursue Jack as their child, thus bringing him home to their family.  At no point did this other party convey this desire directly to me.  At no point did I hear of them making a commitment to embark on Jack's adoption once returning home.  Comments were made about their desire to pursue adoption, yes, but never a clear set goal to bring home Jack.

And yet I wasted a lot of energy struggling with feelings of loneliness, inadequacy, jealousy, anger, sadness and rejection - simply because Satan saw a crack in my armor and weaseled his way in.  1 Peter 5:8-9 states, "Be alert and of sober mind. Your enemy the devil prowls around like a roaring lion looking for someone to devour. Resist him, standing firm in the faith, because you know that the family of believers throughout the world is undergoing the same kind of sufferings."  I admit, he got me.  I didn't go to Maria's looking to adopt, but God had bigger plans and once I began to get on board with those plans, Satan wasted no time in pouncing.  It wasn't hard for him to lead me astray, I was a willing participant in the pity-party going on in my mind, but that just goes to show how important it is to stay diligent and focused on Christ.  It wasn't long before I was back on track as the next part of this story will reveal, but it is unfortunate that I allowed myself to be sucked into this detour when God laid the clear path right out in front of me.  Lesson learned?  I hope so.  Defense mastered?  I seriously doubt it.  Forgiveness ready and waiting for me?  Always - to the praise of His glorious grace.  :)

Ephesians 1:3-6
Praise be to the God and Father of our Lord Jesus Christ, who has blessed us in the heavenly realms with every spiritual blessing in Christ.  For He chose us in Him before the creation of the world to be holy and blameless in his sight.  In love He predestined us for adoption to sonship through Jesus Christ, in accordance with His pleasure and will - to the praise of His glorious grace, which He has freely given us in the One He loves.

A Prayer Request – For Jessica

As Christmas approaches I am reminded each day of the children living in foster homes and orphanages, both here and abroad.  I listen to Steven Curtis Chapman’s “All I Really Want for Christmas” in the car, I receive pictures of orphans portraying a living Nativity scene, watch videos on youtube and facebook, read updates from families in China picking up the newest members of their families just in time for a Christmas together, and I have but to glance up from my computer to see Jack’s face smiling back at me from the front of my microwave.  The reminders are everywhere, but in so many ways they are bittersweet.  There are so many children without homes, without families, but there are also so many I know by name that have hope.  Hope of a family, hope of a future outside of an institution, hope in the love of our Heavenly Father.  It is sad that these children do not have families with which to celebrate the holidays, but it comforting to know there is hope. 

It may seem strange to say this, but in midst of it all my heart does not break for Jack.   Of course I wish he would be home with us for Christmas, but I guess I’m just not in that broken-hearted place.  I am not saddened when I see his picture but just the opposite.  When I see his little face my heart is lifted, it jumps for joy and I can’t help but smile.  I, of course, am saddened by the fact he still lives half a world away, but that is greatly overshadowed by the excitement and knowledge that he has been chosen for us and will be coming home.  I am anxious for our journey to officially claim him as ours and look forward to all the memories just waiting to be created together as a family.  But as I continue to acquire new pictures of Jack there is often another little face smiling in the photos as well, a friend of Jack's that is almost always by his side, and for that small child my heart does ache and my heart does break. For that child, a little girl named Jessica, I am daily saddened by the thought that she has yet to be found by her forever family.  And for Jessica there is no certainty that next Christmas will be different.

Jessica is a beautiful little girl who as, Gianna Jessen would say, has been blessed with the gift of Cerebral Palsy.  Now I know what you may be thinking – cerebral palsy a gift?  It may seem an odd thing to say, but think about this…  If Jessica did not have cerebral palsy then she would not be considered a “special needs” child in the country of China.  If Jessica was not considered a “special needs” child she would not have been placed in a special needs care unit in her orphanage in Luoyang.  If Jessica was not placed in a special needs care unit she would not be under the care of Joyce and Robin Hill, co-founders and operators of the New Hope Foundation.  If Jessica had not been placed within the care of the New Hope Foundation she would never have been given a home at Maria’s Big House of Hope.  If Jessica had never been given the opportunity to live at Maria’s Big House of Hope she may never have had the chance to hear about the love of Jesus Christ.  So, all things considered, I would say that for Jessica cerebral palsy has definitely been a blessing.

Now I can see the other argument rising – what if Jessica wasn’t born with cerebral palsy?  Who is to say that her birth-mother would have still given her up to the care of an orphanage, and I can understand that way of thinking.  But I also know that I have two beautiful, healthy daughters living in my home who were both born in the country of China and who were not born with cerebral palsy and who were still relinquished to care by the government for whatever reasons their birth-parents had.  So who is to say things would be any different?  Not me.  Only God knows what really happened at the time of Jessica’s birth, only God knows all the sides and all the details, but He also knew in advance where this beautiful girl would go in her life and He blessed her with a ticket to Maria’s.

And right there at Maria’s, in the loving care of nannies, nurses, doctors and friends is where Jessica can be found today - waiting with hope for her forever family.  Lively, cheerful and full of smiles, Jessica waits for God to lead the right people to the right place at the right time so that she may also spend her future making memories with a family that loves her.  And so today, as with many days before, I will say my prayers for Jessica and for the family God has planned for her.  I will pray that she continues to be healthy, to grow and learn, and to live a life full of joy.  And I will pray that God will open the hearts of others to pray for her as well.  I will pray for her forever family, and pray that one day soon God will bring that family into Jessica’s life to claim her.  And I ask you with all of my heart, won’t you join me?

To learn more about Jessica and her story, please visit her feature in the Show Hope blog.

http://blog.showhope.org/2009/11/11/mbhoh-spotlight-meet-jessica/ 

My Father's House

A few days ago, during snack time, one of the girls started singing the “big, big house” song by Audio Adrenaline.  Very quickly the rest of us joined in and we ended up laughing a good deal as we changed the lyrics here and there to include different games we like (since Mom doesn’t like football) and food we like to eat (since you can’t forget the ice cream!).  We had a lot of fun and it was a great time to talk about what heaven will be like and how God wants us to come live there with Him.  For those of you not familiar with this particular song, here is the chorus we were singing:

       Come and go with me, to my Father’s house
       Come and go with me, to my Father’s house
       It's a big big house with lots and lots a room
       A big big table with lots and lots of food
       A big big yard where we can play football
       A big big house… It’s my Father’s house

You may wonder why I bring this up today, and some of you who are more familiar with the stories told by the Chapman family about their daughter Maria may think you know where I am headed, but really I’m not.  Basically, I simply love that my girls love this song - even though I don’t quite know where they learned it.  Jolene knows the chorus because she has heard the Maria story, but the others have simply picked it up somewhere.  I know we’ve listened to it in the car before, but not recently and not on a regular basis.  Yet somehow they know it, they love it, and it is a perfect fit for where I am today.

You see, it has gotten quite cold here in Maryland quite quickly.  Being that we moved here in February this technically isn’t our first Maryland winter, but it is our first fall and it is our first introduction to how the cold weather comes in here.  And the last few days have been cold...  And wet...  And make me really want to get my car off our driveway and back into the garage.  Where it is warm...  And dry...  And not cold...  And not wet...  And thus, yesterday I did something a little crazy...

Many years ago, as we moved through our first adoption process, I vowed that I would not set up Jolene’s bedroom until after our paperwork was submitted China.  It just didn’t seem right to do anything so “official” until things were more “official”.  So, after we mailed off her dossier and after we received our log-in date, then and only then did I buy the paint, assemble the crib, shop for a dresser, build the bookshelf and do all the other such getting-ready things.  And then, once everything was put together, the paint was dry, the pandas were on the wall (and the bed, and the dresser, and the bookshelf…), we went back to waiting.  And waiting.  And did I mention waiting? 

With Becca, I don’t really remember when we set up her room.  I know it was sometime between starting her adoption process and bringing her home, but I can’t tell you a definite time.  Getting pregnant with Sophie while waiting for Becca put things in a little different light, and since it wasn’t our first trip down Adoption Lane things seemed a little more certain a little earlier than before.  Regardless, I am fairly certain it was after her paperwork was submitted and logged in on the China side that I actually physically put her crib together, ordered her new sheets and purchased a dresser.  But not so much this time…

You see, that crazy thing I did yesterday… that would be putting together Jack’s bed.  Yes, I know this is a bit premature.  And yes, I know that some people will think that I am totally crazy – I mean our homestudy isn’t even finished yet and here I am building furniture – but it made sense to me.  In reality, the idea arose because of the cold thing I was telling you about.  I really, really want to get my car back into the garage, but I simply could not do it while Jack’s bed was sitting in pieces where the bicycles need to go so that my car can go where it is supposed to go.  So, I figured, why not?  He’s coming home, right?  He’s going to be here someday, right?  God has definitely had His hand in this process so far, so what’s the worst that could happen?  I have too much faith?  I put myself out there in “trust-land” and things don’t go the way we are praying for?  Well, wouldn’t that just be terrible – to trust too much?  What a horrendous idea!   (Can you hear the sarcasm there?)  So I did it.  And it looks good.  And the girls think it is totally cool! 

And the best part?  God has already used that bed to send me a very important message.  I realized this morning that even though building the bed now seems silly, He has already put my bed together too.  In His big, big house.  The one with lots and lots of rooms.  Remember when Jesus told the disciples He was going to prepare a place for them?  Well, guess what, He was going to put our beds together!  I doubt it had anything to do with the weather or getting His car in the garage, but He started getting ready for us long before we would ever find it necessary.  Are we there yet?  No.  Do we need that prepared place right now?  No.  But we’re sure going to.  And isn’t it nice to know that everything is already there waiting for us?  Not just a bed, or a table full of food, but everything we need for all of eternity!

Can you imagine how it would feel for Jack to be told today that we already have a bed ready and waiting for him?  That we are THAT sure he belongs here in our home?  That we are getting ready for his arrival even without knowing when it will be?  So what greater message for God to give me than to remind me that He is SO certain of my place in His family, that He started preparing my place in His house before I even existed.  I don’t know about you, but THAT is one place I definitely want to go!  And I don’t care a bit if people think I’m crazy for already building Jack’s bed.  My Father has mine built too, so I am in very good company.  :-)

Big House – By Audio Adrenaline

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=eozdE2G668w&feature=related

I don't know where you lay your head or where you call your home
I don't know where you eat your meals or where you talk on the phone
I don't know if you got a cook a butler or a maid
I don't know if you got a yard with a hammock in the shade

I don't know if you got some shelter, say a place to hide
I don't know if you live with friends in whom you can confide
I don't know if you got a family say a mom or dad
I don't know if you feel love at all but I bet you wish you had

[PRE CHORUS]  Come and go with me, to my Father's house
                             Come and go with me, to my Father's house

[CHORUS]           It's a big big house with lots and lots a room
                             A big big table with lots and lots of food
                             A big big yard where we can play football
                             A big big house… It's my Father's house

All I know is a big ole house with rooms for everyone
All I know is lots a land where we can play and run
All I know is you need love and I've got a family
All I know is your all alone so why not come with me?

Come and go with me, to my Father's house
Come and go with me, to my Father's house
It's a big big house with lots and lots a room
A big big table with lots and lots of food
A big big yard where we can play football
A big big house… It's my Father's house

The High Cost of Adoption

As I posted on facebook a few days back, I have been trying to not focus on the complete cost of the adoption process at this time as we are truly taking this journey one step at a time.  To make things a bit more palatable, we have just been focusing on one fee at a time in order to be ready when each new bill comes due.  We have adopted from China twice before so it’s not like we’re completely clueless to the cost, and that is really why I have tried to avoid the long list of dollar signs whenever I can.  This is a pricey endeavor no matter how you look at it and since we really had no plans to jump into another adoption at quite this point in our lives we are even more unprepared for the cost now than we were twice before.  But, here we are, right where God has planned us to be… so in all reality that long list of dollar signs really is our reality so I can’t completely ignore it.  

More to the point, more and more people have been asking me questions about the “total cost”, the “timeline for payments”, etc., so I thought perhaps a walk through the numbers might be in order.  Now, please know for sure, I am not posting this information to in anyway gloat about how much money we are willing to spend to bring Jack home – that is certainly not the case.  Nor am I posting the information to overwhelm you with the financial side of adoption – I certainly don’t want to do that either.  I just thought you might find it interesting, especially those of you new to the adoption world, to see just how the numbers break down and just why the numbers add up to so much.

 

So, with no further ado, here is a list of the itemized fees associated with a Chinese adoption.  See you on the other end!

Adoption Agency Fees - Chinese Children Adoption International: 

(*denotes fees we have already paid)

Application Fee - $200*

First Program Fee - $2,250*

USCIS Filing & Fingerprinting - $720 plus $85 per adult (this is the immigration step)

Dossier Preparation – approx. $450
Home Study – as agreed with local home study agency (see below)

Second Program Fee - $2,260

CCAA Fee - $1050 (China Center of Adoption Affairs)

Third Program Fee - $1,350

Post Adoption Deposit - $500

Visa to enter China - $130 (plus courier fee)

US Domestic & International Airfare - $1,000-$1,800 per adult plus return airfare for child

In China Travel & Accommodations – approx. $2,400-$3,200 for two adults

Adoption Registration & Notarization (in China) - $400-$800

Child’s Passport (in China) - $100-$150

Orphanage Fee – approx. $5000

Food (in China) - $600-$800 per couple

Child Physical & Photo (in China) - $80

Child U.S. Entry Visa - $400

Post Adoption Services – as agreed with local home study agency (see below)

Local Homestudy Agency - America World Adoption:

Application - $50*

Home Study - $2,000*

Home Study Mileage Fee - $84*

Post Adoption Reports – 2 @ $400 each*

Re-Adoption Paperwork (if needed) - $450

Home Study/Dossier Paperwork Fees &Expenses:

CA Secretary of State Certification fee - $20*   

Postage – $4.90 x 2*

Chinese Embassy Authentication, Los Angeles - $65*  

Postage - $18.85 x 2*

Copy of each parent’s Complete Driving Record (TN) - $12*

Child Abuse Clearance from CA - $30*

Police and Child Care Clearance/Fingerprinting for MD - $112.50*

Postage - $4.90*

Various Notary fees - $4-8 each, approximately 10-12 documents

County Certification fees - $7

MD Secretary of State Certification fee - $45

VA Secretary of State Certification fee – $10

Postage - $18.85 x 2

US. Department of State Authentication – $80

Postage - $18.85 x 2

Chinese Embassy Authentication, Wash. D.C.  – $200

Postage - $18.85 x 2

Well, what do you think?  Want to join us?  Think we’re crazy?  It is a lot of numbers isn’t it?  And a lot of paperwork – ugh!  But no matter how overwhelming or intimidating the above list may appear, it is most important to remember that the journey is SO totally worth it!  And the ultimate result - Jack being home with his family - is invaluable!  Just think of it this way, God was willing to pay for your adoption with the blood of His son - that reality makes this list pale in comparison, don't you think?  Every adoption is expensive, whether domestic or international, but none is as costly as when each of us was bought and paid for on the cross.  I'll be the first to admit, sometimes this list is purely daunting, and sometimes the numbers make me roll my eyes, check our bank balance and wonder where it will all come from.  But then I pull myself back up from the floor, dust myself off, and remind myself that God put us here and God will provide in God's timing.  And then I'm okay again - at least until I look at the list again.  Ha!  But that is why I don't spend time looking at it.  And now that you have seen it, you don't need to look at it anymore either.  Just say a prayer, smile for Jack, and watch where we're going.  I guarantee it's worth hanging around for.  : )

Nothing Philosophical - Part 3

Our first night in China was spent doing the traditional “getting to know you” group things.  We had pizza for dinner (yes, pizza) and then went around the table sharing our names, hometowns, little things about ourselves, etc.  The point of all of this was only partly for forging friendship sake, it was mainly to keep our group of 20 travelers awake so we could avoid jetlag and adjust to the new time-zone as quickly as possible.  One of the most telling questions of the evening, for me anyway, was the inevitable “Why did you sign up to come on this trip?”  I honestly had no good answer to this question.  I listened to person after person talk about being God-led, about wanting to “love on some babies” and various other mission callings, but I really didn’t have any of those answers.  My only answer was that I had finally found something I could do with Show Hope.  It sounded a bit trivial at the time, and in a way it still does, but that was really all I had.  

  

As a side note, a few weeks ago one of my China-trip friends (a really cool chick from Australia) reminded me of this conversation and pointed out that one of the reasons I went on this trip was so God could introduce me to our son.  Obviously that would never have been an answer I’d give that night, but in hind-sight it is most definitely true.  Just more proof that God has a much bigger plan than we could ever imagine.  

Our first full day in China was spent sightseeing at the Great Wall in the morning, followed by a visit to the Hope Healing Home in Beijing.  This was my first introduction to the New Hope Foundation, which runs and operates Maria’s Big House of Hope, and I was hooked.  Even though we have adopted from China twice before, both of our adoptions were of “healthy” children and I really had no working knowledge of how special needs adoptions and/or orphan cared worked. We were given a tour of the facility and an informative talk by one of the directors of New Hope, Robin Hill, and it all fascinated me.  As I listened intently to the details of the “waiting child” system I could easily imagine my putting this information to good use.  I have spent years advocating for adoption, but the only experiences I had to draw from were our own two adoptions.  Now I was gathering loads of information about another form of the adoption process and I was seeing huge possibilities for this whole new realm of knowledge as I became more comfortable with advocating both systems.

After our stint at Hope Healing House, we headed back to the airport for our flight to Luoyang, home to Maria’s Big House of Hope.  We would arrive at Maria’s late that night and be given a full tour in the morning.

I cannot tell you when I first met Jack (then called Jim) at Maria’s.  It may have been that first full day, but I honestly cannot remember.  I do remember that my first day or two there were spent pretty much in a blur.  I still wasn’t quite sure what I was doing there, and the way that others seemed to jump right in to playing with babies and joking around with nannies and staff was a bit disconcerting to me.  I’m not really all that much of an extrovert in the first place and although I didn’t feel uncomfortable in the situation, I wasn’t really sure what to do with myself either.  I spent a lot of those first couple days praying – about my trip and Maria’s, but also about my own homelife, my kids, my husband, our new home, God’s purpose for me, and just about everything else you can think of.  As I have told many people since I returned from this trip, it turned out I had a lot to work through in my own personal journey before I could truly give myself over to this adventure at Maria’s, but that is an entirely different discussion.

By the third full day of our trip, I think I was coming around.  My first true memories of Jack are from the preschool room on the first floor of Maria’s.  I may have had contact with him before this, but honestly that is something I can neither confirm nor deny.  I remember him from preschool as being extremely quiet, but extremely smart.  He sat on the floor working puzzles, one after another, as well as willingly doing craft projects.  He was also very attentive to the needs of one of the other more limited-movement children as she played next to him.  Thinking back I think he did stand out to me a bit from the beginning, but I actually spent most of my preschool experiences playing with two of the other boys in the room.  This, however, is what I remember as my first impressions.

I can’t really tell you when it was that Jack started to pull on my heartstrings either.  I remember what thoughts went running through my mind, but couldn’t for the life of me tell you what day of the trip it was.  I remember I was sitting on floor just inside the door of the Tinker Bell room with a little girl named Jessica and I was just watching him play.  I can’t remember what he was doing, or if he was interacting with another child or not, but I remember thinking that he had the potential for so much more LIFE.  He didn’t look unhappy, in fact he was having a great time, but there was just something in his eyes that seemed to be waiting for something more.  (For those who have read my “I Miss Jim” blog this might sound familiar.)  I remember out of the blue thinking, “He would be so happy with our girls.  He would fit right in.”  Now, for anyone who has met, or even just heard stories of our girls this may seem nuts.  Here was this quiet, reserved little boy and my imagination was placing him in the midst of the complete whirlwind of chaos that follows our crowd of girls like Pig Pen’s dust cloud.  But somehow it just seemed the right fit.  From all that I had seen of his intellect in the preschool room, and all that I was experiencing one-on-one with him in his home base room, it just seemed like a match made in heaven. 

But, there was a HUGE problem with this idea and it weighed on my heart with far more intensity than I was first willing to admit.  Remember that whole net worth qualification for adoption thing?  Well, as far as I knew no rich uncle had died and left us his fortune in the few short days I had been in China.  Our net worth was still exactly as it had been when I left home a few days before.  As much as I looked at Jack and wanted to take him home there was absolutely no way we qualified to adopt given our current financial situation.  I had filled out that financial statement form twice before and knew how it worked.  The only way to do this was to wait a really, really long time until we actually had more money to our names – not something that was going to happen overnight given one source of income, rental housing and a family of six. 

Quick note - I just realized as I was proofreading this, that as much as I cannot remember when exactly I met Jack, I cannot remember when God changed my heart about going home with an adoption plan either.  Honestly, I don't think I ever even questioned it.  Dan and I had agreed to leave the idea of another adoption as an option in our lives but, as I said, I left this country convinced that this trip was absolutely NOT about adopting and I obviously came home with a different heart.  But who knows when my heart made that turn around?  I guess God does, which is good, because I sure don't.

Weekly Update November 21

To alleviate some of the over-emailed irritation I know I have been causing some people I have come up with a weekly update format for future emails and I will be posting these update here as well.  From now on, all of my adoption emails will come with separate sections for where we are in the process, any fund-raising news, prayer requests, and a final catch-all category for other "stuff".  Hopefully that will streamline things a bit.  It should make life a bit better for those who just want a quick update on process, as well as satisfy those who want to know a lot of details.  I also promise to never send out more than one update email in a week's time - the only excepting being our travel notification announcement which I will shout as loud as I can from the highest mountaintop as soon as we get it!  I claim no once-a-week limit to blogging though so all bets are off here.  :)

Process Updates:

Our home study is almost complete – all visits have been made, the last of our doctor forms submitted, and TN paperwork has arrived.  We are now just waiting on our fingerprints to be cleared by the state of Maryland and the FBI.  My prints seem to be moving through the process faster than Dan’s, but we are still waiting on reports for both of us.  Once those arrive, hopefully SOON, we should be able to have our homestudy reviewed by our adoption agency, signed off on by our homestudy agency, and submitted to Immigration fairly quickly.  Hopefully….

We did make a bit of headway on our end this week.  I was able to take a collection of completed paperwork to Annapolis for county and state seals.  This makes that stack of paperwork ready for submission to the US State Department for that seal.  This is good, but not entirely helpful as we are waiting for that dang homestudy so that we can send everything to DC in one envelope as it will cost us $40 postage per package mailed.   Still one step closer though.

Fund-Raiser Updates:

I have heard from a couple of my Ultimate Girl’s Night Out vendors about sales donations.  One will be submitting a check for $20 and a second check should be coming for roughly the same amount.  That is at least a bit of good news – those 20’s will cover that needed postage to the US State Department.  J

We are still selling Show Hope t-shirts.  They are $25 each, and you can see all 8 shirts and ordering information at our family blog -  http://foraplace.blogspot.com.  Our first goal was to sell 50 shirts in order to profit $500 and pay our Post Adoption Deposit, due to CCAI before travel.   We have sold 37 shirts so far – not bad! – but we still need to sell the remaining 13 (at least).  We have 1 sale pending, but would love for you to consider supporting us by supporting Show Hope.  (www.showhope.org) 

***NEW*** 

We are also excited to announce a new fund-raising opportunity we have – “Joe” for Jack.  Just Love Coffee, a family owned business in Murfreesboro, TN, has set up an adoption fund-raising account in our name.  This means that you can now buy coffee and support our cause at the same time.  Please take a moment to visit our coffee store at http://www.justlovecoffee.com/TheShipleys and see what “we” have to offer.  The prices are quite competitive with Starbucks and Gloria Jeans, and for each bag of coffee purchased on our site, Just Love Coffee will donate $5 to our adoption fund.  Coffee for you, a trip home for Jack - just another win-win situation.  J

Other “Stuff”:

Just as a side note, I was lucky enough to volunteer at the Show Hope table last night at “A Night with the Chapmans” event featuring the band Caleb, several song sets by Steven Curtis Chapman, and the testimony of Mary Beth Chapman.  I had a great time, and was very excited to see Jack’s face right in the middle of things.  The Show Hope newsletter featuring Jack on the cover was displayed abundantly on the Show Hope table, and it was such a blessing to watch our son witness for Show Hope all the way from the other side of the world.  I think his picture actually made more one-on-one contact with attendees than our group of volunteers did.  What a great story he has!  And what a wonderful way for me to spend the evening with our son.

**If you do not currently receive adoption emails from me but would like to start, please let me know with a "comment" and I will get you added to the list.  Thanks!

"Joe" for Jack

Hey!  Did you hear?  We're now in the coffee selling business.  Who knew?  This journey just keeps taking us in more and more new directions!

Here are the details:
Just Love Coffee Roasters is a family run business in Murfreesboro, TN providing adoptive families financial assistance in their journey.  Through their adoption fund-raising program, we have been able to set up our own coffee "store" located on the web at http://www.justlovecoffee.com/TheShipleys.  For each bag of coffee sold through our store website Just Love Coffee will donate $5 to our adoption fund.  It is THAT easy!  You buy and enjoy great coffee - we earn dollars toward the Jack fund.  Another win-win situation!

So, what are you waiting for?  Go check out our coffee shop!  :)

"Just Love Coffee Roasters takes the two passions of its founder,orphans and Fair Trade coffee, and incorporates them into one symbiotic relationship that is Just Love Coffee Roasters. If you're an adopting family raising money for your adoption or just a lover of quality Fair Trade coffees that help Kids Care orphanage in Addis Ababa, Ethiopia, you are supporting orphans by drinking Just Love Coffees.
Roasting Fair Trade Specialty coffees, Just Love uses proceeds to help an Ethiopian orphanage and families adopting not just from Ethiopia, but from anywhere in the world."  To learn more about Just Love Coffee be sure to visit the "Our Story" link on their website.
 
P.S.  A huge "THANK YOU" to my sister-in-law and her friend who headed us in this direction.

Nothing Philosophical - Part 2

Okay, I simply cannot leave that last blog in the title spot for very long so I thought I would jump in real quick with the next installment of the how-we-got-here story.  I'm not going to delete or remove the previous post because it too is part of this journey, but I am also not going to dwell on it anymore than I have so let's get back to the fun stuff...

When we first started planning my new journey to China, the task was a bit daunting.  The trip was expensive and we had very little cash to throw toward it.  Also, this adventure was going to take me away from home for at least 10 days.  That may not seem like a big deal to you, but with four children, ages 7 and under, and a full-time working spouse, 10 days is a long time for Mom to be away.  But we put out our feelers, sent out support letters, agreed to use a bit of the money we had left from selling our house and pushed forward.  Long story short, on August 12th I was heading to China - trip paid for and family and friends set to babysit.  Ready, set, jump!

I have said this many times since I first registered to go on the "first ever Show Hope Sponsor Trip", and I know there are those who still don't believe me, but when I signed up for this trip I had absolutely no intention of coming back with adoption plans.  Really.  It's true!  From the very beginning people made fun of me - Dan told people I was carving a child-sized hole in foam for my suitcase, church friends asked how many children I was going to sneak back with me, the jabs came from many different directions.  But I truly, honestly had no adoption intentions.  This trip was 100% about finally getting to do something for Show Hope, and finally feeling like I could offer something back.  And then God spoke to me by way of the Show Hope China Missions Handbook.

You see, the night before our group was to meet at the Chicago airport and head overseas I flew to Chicago and met up with three of my soon-to-be new mission trip family members - mainly to avoid possible delays and missed flights on trip day.  After arriving in Chicago, meeting up with my roommate for the evening, having a yummy spaghetti dinner and meeting the other two members of our group, I went back to our hotel room and started reading through my handbook.  Yep, I admit, I was already in Chicago by the time I gave the handbook a really good look-see, but remember I am the mother of four children, ages 7 and under, so cut me a little slack, okay?  Not a whole lot of peace and quiet going on around here and I had perused enough to make sure I knew what I was doing.  Anyway, it was here that God first started talking to me about adopting again, and for the record the words He whispered to me were not "go for it!"

Instead, the paperwork I was reading very clearly said, "You do not qualify."  And there it was. You see, it works like this..  When we moved to Maryland, we sold our house in Tennessee and became renters on base at Fort Meade.  Then, we took a huge portion of our house proceeds and used it to pay off my car and pay down one remaining debt in our journey to debt-free land.  Why does this matter, you ask?  Because by being renters and by not banking our house profits, we drastically altered our overall net worth - one big piece of the puzzle for adoption eligibility.  I looked at that net worth requirement number and knew right then and there that this trip was not about adopting again.  And I must admit I probably looked a heck of a lot like the Cheshire Cat as a very smug "I told you so" look came across my face.  No one wanted to believe me, but this trip was not about finding a child to adopt and now I could prove it.  (Or so I thought.)

The next morning I woke up with a renewed spirit.  This may have just been residual effects of sleeping without small children around for the first time in four years, but I'd like to think of it in more spiritual terms.  In many ways my heart was at peace.  I saw this trip as a huge learning experience, and with the whole adoption thing off the table I was free to explore and learn and soak up whatever I could.  So off I went, headed for China, ready for an adventure but never expecting what I got - and I'm not just talking about Jack.

Caution: Contains Some Whining - Read At Your Own Risk

So, “The Ultimate Girl’s Night” is over and it didn’t do as well as I had hoped, but I think I am slowly getting over that.  As I wrote in my last blog, “it is what it is” and now I must move on.  In hindsight, I am very thankful to have written that blog on Friday (thank you, sister-in-law Carrie, for prompting me to write), as its message has helped me a great deal through my struggle to keep things in perspective these couple of days after.  I have been really frustrated with the small outcome of the event and have really wrestled with how much to share with you here and how exactly to explain things so that my comments don’t come out all wrong or unintentionally offend someone.  After having a short chat with my loving sister-in-law these evening, however, I think I’m going to try.

First of all, I want to make one thing VERY clear.  As I reflect on the events of Friday night, I am in no way frustrated or upset with anyone involved with the "Ultimate Girl’s Night Out" other than myself.  Dan and I have been very blessed by others’ generosity and we are very grateful to be approximately $400 closer to our bill paying goal of $2500.  We would never have had those dollars in our adoption fund if it had not been for the vendors, the helpers, the shoppers, the donators, and the many, many prayers lifted over our plans.  All of those prayers, plans and people came together in a wonderful way to support our efforts to bring Jack home, and they are all now a part of his story.  To each of you, we are very grateful.  Friday truly was a success if you look at the contributions of our immediate community of support. 

But… All of that said, that myriad of positive things simply does not balance out all of the negative things I have been carrying around in my heavy heart for the past 48 hours.  I’m going to be very honest here, okay?  (I’ll assume you just said “yes”, because otherwise you probably wouldn’t still be reading this blog anymore anyway, right?)  If nothing else, I am sure that by now you know my writing well enough to know I don’t sugarcoat much.   If I’m going to log in and tell my story, I am going to say what is true - and what is true right now is that I failed.  I have failed Jack, failed my family, and failed to hit a financial mark that we so desperately needed to hit before our homestudy is finalized.  My deepest fear is that our homestudy will be completed, but will just sit here stagnant while we wait for funds to appear so that we can pay the next agency fee and move further forward in this journey.  Truthfully, I am very disappointed in myself.  I am saddened that I did not provide a better turnout for my vendors.  I am frustrated that I used one of our precious fund-raising opportunities for an event that didn’t turn nearly the profit we need to hit that aforementioned mark.  And I am simply mad at myself for not being able to “pull this off” – that I didn’t inspire people to step up, that I wasn’t able to sell the idea, and that I did not manage to reach out and find a responsive audience.  For the past two days these feelings have really run the gauntlet – anger, frustration, sadness, disappointment, depression.  If it fits in the “yuck” category I’ve probably been there – and I've probably been there more than once.  

But, believe it or not, this is not all bad news...In addition to all the words I could sit here and list in the “yuck” category, I have also felt some other things.  I have experienced hopefulness, assurance, joy, satisfaction, determination and peacefulness, to name just a few.  As much as I have struggled with myself about my failures and shortcomings, I also know that ultimately God is in control.  In all reality, I turned Friday night over to Him and gave Him full control before, during and after the event so this really isn’t about me at all.  Am I happy with the outcome – yes and no, I covered that above.  But do I trust that He has a plan for the next step of this journey?  Absolutely.  Where is the rest of the money going to come from?  I have absolutely no idea.  Will we have to wait a long time for it?  Again, I have absolutely no idea.  Will our financial shortcomings mean a delay in our process and a later trip to bring Jack home?  Once again, I have absolutely no idea.  But when I cut through all of my own “all about me” pity-party crap, I know that it doesn’t really matter what I know.  God knows.  And God has a plan.  And God’s plans are always way better than mine, even if they run contrary to my planning.  And that I absolutely do know.

So, for now I will drop this topic here.  Hopefully you aren’t too put off by my whining and complaining and wallowing in self-pity.  And hopefully you truly understand how very grateful I am to all who chose to be even the smallest part of our "Ultimate Girl’s Night Out".  It is what it is, and it will always be just that.  Nothing can be changed about it now.  When the online sales close on Friday and the vendor donations are posted, we will see the final result of the effort.  But as I said on Friday, huge success or small victory it all belongs to the Lord so I will simply pray that it may all be to the praise of His glorious grace.

Finally, I would like to leave you with a few scripture passages which have been running through my mind these past couple of days.  They have helped me stay centered on the things that are true, fight back against the voices of doubt and depression, and remain focused on the things that really count.  I pray that they may speak to you as well.  Thank you for continuing on this journey with us, your support is immeasurably precious.

Proverbs 3:5-6  “Trust in the Lord with all your heart, and do not rely on your own understanding.  In all your ways acknowledge Him, and He will make straight your paths.”

Psalm 37:4-5  “Take delight in the Lord, and He will give you the desires of your heart.  Commit your way to the Lord; trust in Him, and He will act."

Psalm 55:22  “Cast your burden on the Lord, and He will sustain you; He will never permit the righteous to be moved.”

Isaiah 41:10  “Fear not, for I am with you, be not dismayed, for I am your God; I will strengthen you, I will help you, I will uphold you with my victorious right hand.”

Hebrews 12:1-3   “…let us run with perseverance the race that is set before us, looking to Jesus the pioneer and perfecter of our faith…” 

Romans 12:1-2   “I appeal to you therefore, brethren, by the mercies of God to present your bodies as a living sacrifice, holy and acceptable to God, which is your spiritual worship.  Do not be conformed to this world but be transformed by the renewal of your mind, that you may prove what is the will of God, what is good and acceptable and perfect.”

 

James 1:27  "Religion that is pure and undefiled before God and the Father is this:  to visit orphans and widows in their affliction, and to keep oneself unstained from the world."